Skip to main content

Mars, Venus, Whatever

I'm sure you've heard this before 'Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus'.
It's actually the title of book written by John Gray in 1992.
According to this book, the source of many misunderstanding between the two gender is the difference between their communication style and emotional need.
One thing I most agree is that women talks about their problems to find friendly allies, just to be heard. However, men talks to get solution for their problem.

As a girl, I often find that men are the most insensitive creature on earth.
They just don't have a clue about unspeakable needs of girls.
Or maybe they just play dumb? LOL

Take my dad as a simple case study.

He almost never remember anyone's birth day.
He even forgotten my mom's birthday, which I found rather unbelievable since it was on Dec 24.
I mean, it's ONE day before CHRISTMAS, Dad!
He also forgets mine and my sisters, but we've gotten used to it.

So on Christmas night, while having our Christmas-dinner-slash-Mom's-bday-treat,
we talk about this 'habbit' of him.
Mom told us an anecdote about an employee of hers and his ex-girlfriend.
Cut the story short, he forgot about her birthday.
She got pissed (obviouslyyyyy) and she broke up with him right away.
Hearing this, dad tooks the poor guy's side (surprise suprise).
He said, when the girl broke up with him, she actually did him a favor.
(Dad : "What kind of girl break up because of such silly reason)
And I (and Mom, and my sister) was like,
WHAAAAAT???
It's NOT silly!
How can this guy possibly loves her if he cannot even remember her birthday?
But Dad said that care about someone does not positively correlated with doing small things
(such as a simple happy birthday) that could make her/him happy (huh? I'm confused myself)


So now, can you see how men and women is NOT the same?

I often wonder about this 'phenomenon'.
How can a man and a woman be so different yet they instinctively looking for each other 'half'.
But after some thinking, maybe this differences that pull them towards each other in the first place.
Like the positive and negative polar of magnets that pull each other closer.
They complete each other.

But isn't this difference itself that makes relationship is hard to maintain?
After you found each other, how could you survive 'the war'?
The war of a constant misundertanding, of not knowing what each other wanted,
repeatedly disappointed, and as a result, hurt.

I think the best recipe for this is, well, nothing but a good communication.
If men are bad on reading clues, just tell him what you want.
I know sometimes it's not that simple.
But I believe if you love someone, you wouldn't let him/her slip through your fingers just because you don't try hard enough, right?
Well, at least, I do.
I believe that fall in love is a choice.
But a good relationship is a result of hardwork :)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

When God Made a Promise

“I know this is too fast. And please don’t ask me why, because I don’t have the answer. I don’t know why.” “I won’t ask you why. Because I know.. It’s God.”   Wkwkwkwkwwkwkwkwkww duh supershy padahal biasanya ga tau malu. I’m still getting used to this. But those who viewed our IG feed and saw the pic posted in FB would know what this is all about. The Promise of God. It’s been there, mentioned the wholeee time in my earlier posts, yet unnamed. I’ll try to recall the whole story. Some details would be lost in translation because there are wayyyy TOO MANY. Haha. Fyi. I’VE BEEN WAITING SOOO LOOOONG TO SHOUT THIS OUT LOUD. So, here goes. Last Sunday, R asked me out to dinner. A few days before, he’s mentioned this fancy place and I calmly (I think) said, “Yes, yes why not” while inside I was [insert screaming emoji here] knowing that this is not a normal dining experience. OMG. I was so glad it’s through a text message, otherwise he would see ...
4 comments
Read more

My Miracle

So this weekend, my mom and Febe was in town. In fact, I've just sent them off a few hours ago. WOW! Wow God wow! That's all I can say.. I'm loving every second I spent with the two. Good food, good times. But above them all, good talk. The best kind of talk where God is so evident, so powerful, so ever-present, in everything that we said. Sometimes we tend to talk about God's miracle like it was so far away, so abstract, when actually it is right there in front of us. So tangible, we can grasp it with our hands. For example, when Febe mentioned about Dad and the accident and his sickness. We can see how God allowed his pride to be crushed. And out of a new-found humility, God shaped His character : more Christ, less of himself. I knew who my dad was, and I know who he is now. And all I can see is miracle written all over him. Through the worst the world can assume, God brings in His best for our good. Not to mentioned how God put a heart o...
Post a Comment
Read more

Thirty Three Is The New Three

“God’s reward growth with pruning. More growth.” I stumbled across a worship moment on YouTube and the word spoken by Michael Miller breathe fresh air into my soul. “Pruning seasons are strange. You get disoriented. You think, “What did I do wrong?” Nothing. My shears are the reward of fruitfulness. You’re being positioned for greater fruitfulness.” Sometimes I forgot that the One who wants to see all of His promises fulfilled in my life more than myself is the Promiser Himself. And in the in-between seasons, He’s still the sweetest reward. A few days ago I woke up with a DM on my Instagram. A friend stumbled across my profile, clicked on my blog and she told me she started crying because God revealed many heart issues she’s not even aware of. I am in awe of what God’s doing behind the scene. The last post was, so far, the hardest writing in my life. I wrote it down while it’s still fresh in my heart, the disappointment, the struggle, the embrace. But today, I wrote from a totally diff...
Post a Comment
Read more