HAPPY NEW YEAR BELOVED PEOPLE!
2018! WOHOO!
Been a while! Last few weeks were the busiest!
Wedding marathons! (7 weddings in 2 months got me like.. WKWKWK. Anyways, not mine!)
The hustle and bustle of Christmas preparations.
FINALLY Cuil proposed to my bebeb Gece hahahahahahahaha. MY HEART IS FULL!
It was such an honour to witness everything..
I could see God's love in every single details.
From the UBERSHORT preparation (I've seen birthday with more, er, thorough preparation. wkwkwkw).
But I guess God knows Cuil WKWKWK. And He knows that Cuil wouldn't be able to pull this thing off himself if not by the help of Dapit and Lala (and Roma, dikit).
I didn't to anything, really. Except if recording a blurry video and blowing out mini paper trumpet counted for something lol.
But I wouldn't forget waiting expectantly, QUIETLY, for Gece to come 'delivering the forgotten but urgently needed photo-printer'.
And how cute Gide when ushering onti Gece to the room inside.
I remember holding back my tears (and the noisy snot that followed every tears) so I could a snotty-free-sound video recording. Lol.
And then Cuil sang. And cried. And Gece cried, too. And the ring was out.
And our prayer afterward. OH THE PRAYER.
To be surrounded by the people that are dear to our hearts, sharing this magical moments, and knowing that God was surely in the midst of us because His love was so overwhelming!
So warm and overwhelming!
On our way back home Cuil shared that he was unsure about the song he's written a day before.
He just couldn't memorize the lyrics (like, duh, H-1??)
He thought of singing other people's song that he's memorized beforehand, but he wanted to include God in the lyrics.
So he printed out the lyrics of his own song wkwkwkwk and took the risk to sing that song to Gece.
You know what?
It turned out AMAZING! (Even Febe wanted to do a cover immediately hahaha)
Well, really. If God is in the equation, nothing could bring you down.
And another thing that mark 2017 was this:
When my 2 beloved men met. WKWKWKWKKWKWWK.
Yes. My mom and Febe has met R before.
But this was my dad's first time meeting R.
If you ask me, "Were you nervous?"
Hmmmmm.
Somehow I always have this confident that my dad would eventually like R.
Why such confidence?
Ok. First of all, because they both have something in common : they both love me.
HAHAHAH. Gila sih super pede. But ya.. I always know that they both have my best interest in mind.. So, yea, eventually, they would accept, and even love each other.
Secondly, MAINLY, because God has told me that this is not my battle.
There are so many future battles (seen and unforeseen battles), but this one, THIS approval for parents thingy, is never mine in the first place.
He had promised me that this is His battle.
Which explains the supernatural peace that is in me the whole time
So came the miraculous moment : where dad met R. R met dad.
Why miraculous? Because dad didn't even want to meet R in the first place.
Hahaha. Don't ask me why.
I couldn't fathom a guy's mind, even if this guy is my dad himself.
But in my limitations, my perfect Father knows me well, knows my dad well.
Even better than we know ourselves.
Even better than we know ourselves.
So He set us a date and time and the divine opportunity.
So much emotions (at least on my end) stirred up that day, last minute changes and all *roll eyes*
But still I know that God is in control!
To cut the story short, the dinner went well.
From the first handshake to the last goodbye-and-see-you, it's like the five of us had done in dozens dinner before. My dad and R and mom talked a lot.
And mostly about things that Febe and I knew nothing about. We were like.. *....blank*
But! As long as the rest enjoyed each other's company, I got no complaint at all!
The next day tho.
The four of us (R was busy. It was a Christmas Sunday fyi) was having lunch at Lau Pa Sat.
I've successfully avoided the holiday crowd around city YAAZ!
And while enjoying our lunch, out of nowhere, my dad suddenly stopped his talk and said to me,
"Kakak.."
Ok lah I skip the knees-weakening detail, wkwkw you may approach me for further info lol.
But simply put, my dad's heart is won.
LIKE WHAAAT? I couldn't hold back my tears (ini hati apa tahu? Kayanya dulu ga selembek begini..) upon hearing my dad's sentences.
His words were like a reminder of what God has promised me, even before He mentioned specifically to pray for R.
A few talks after that, a few conversations later, my dad's opinion on R remained unshaken.
The thing that amazes me in the first place was that during that dinner, when R met dad, there was no personal questions asked by my dad. There was no, "Tell me about your past. Show me your skeleton in the closet. Tell me your biggest fear in life."
No such thing.
No such thing.
It might as well be one of my other friend who had been invited to join our family dinner.
Really.
I still couldn't shake this 'was I dreaming' kinda-feel from seeing how God, once again, perfectly fulfilled His promise to me.
And one thing for sure. I know He is not finished yet.
There are so many things God has promised me. And R.
And there are so many process that we have to go through that will prepare us, equip us, for days to come.
Naturally I was not the type that embrace CHANGES happily.
Someone should shove me hard to make me take a plunge towards any changes.
But God, the King of shoving, wkwkwkwk, has taught me that when I had no choice than to jump (and I jumped, indeed), He met me halfway. He always does.
When I thought the fire surely would burn me down, He proved to me that I am fireproof, for greater He who is in me, than he who is in the world.
A few days ago, I've written something in WCM's Whatsapp group.
Something like, "It feels like I'm standing on the edge of a waterfall. I know I should jump. But the height and the mighty torrent down there frightens me. Been staring, and staring, and trying to be brave to jump for quite some times. I know that I have 2 choices. Stay where it's safe. Or.. Maybe it's better if I just hold my breath, and just.. jump."
NO, I'M NOT SUICIDAL. THESE ARE ALL METAPHORES OKAY.
Ok but there, I've jumped.
And I know there's no turning back.
I might lose everything that define who I am all this while.
But I will gain God.
Boaz answered her, “I’ve heard all about you—heard about the way you treated your mother-in-law after the death of her husband, and how you left your father and mother and the land of your birth and have come to live among a bunch of total strangers. God reward you well for what you’ve done—and with a generous bonus besides from God, to whom you’ve come seeking protection under his wings.” Ruth 2 :11-12 MSG
So here's to 2018. For Him to move into the center, while I slip off to the sidelines.
Here's to 2018. From promise to promise.
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