I can't believe it's only a month ago since the last post.
Too much happenings and roller coaster ride with God.
Everyday, new things unfolded, discovered, unveiled before my eyes.
A few days ago, the day before Christmas, we (papa, mama, Febe, and I) went to Makassar, dad's hometown. TBH, I'd chose Jakarta home anytime for Christmas.
But well, what's important was family (papa senang), and as long as God's approved, then I'm good to go.
It was simply the best Christmas. The Prince of Peace Himself was with us.
I always know that my dad's side of family tree was sorta "colorful."
But not until God showed me, Himself, I finally understood a part of His grand plan to redeem me, and my extended family.
Here's a brief background about my dad's siblings of 5:
The first and fourth son have passed away. The first was due to sickness. The fourth was due to something shadier which I was uncleared of anyway. Both leaving some 'colorful' legacy as well.
The second son was my dad. You know our story. Or you can scroll to previous posts for more details hahaha.
The third, my aunt has 5 kids from 3 marriages. The first daughter (my cousin) was married for a year but apparently they are now separated.
God reminded me all these facts. And one thing cross my mind : generational curse.
It was so obvious (well, now haha) that there's something going on in my family that WAS NOT of God. I don't know which generation started all this, what had happened to create such loop hole where the evil one freely roam like a lion, creating division and destroying marriage in our family.
And this has reached my layer, seeing my cousin's short-lived marriage.
Not only flipping over this puzzle pieces, He also flipping over other pieces:
His plans for redemption.
When my mom met my dad, she had nothing in mind.
Little did she know that she'll be the agent of change in my dad's life.
She wasn't perfect. But she perseveres.
That perseverance created room for God to move in our family.
She has struggled a lot, which is YA OF COURSE LA STRUGGLE LA YA, loving and serving my dad who carried the baggage of his family tree. All the bitterness who has been passed away from generation to generation.
See, mom doesn't feel special, but I can see clearly how God brought my mom to my dad : an agent of change, an agent for family redemption.
She persevered. She learned to love like Jesus. She made it possible for God to come to our rescue.
I couldn't imagine if she decided to give up, to just leave, to call everything off.
I remember those times when the only thing that made her stick with my dad was my sister and I.
How faithful God is.. He moves heaven and earth to save us.
He moves heaven and earth to redeem us.
I can't even.............
God's perfect plan was BEYOND our best scenarios.
He reminded me that THIS is exactly why He set me and my sister apart for His Kingdom.
He reminded me that the only way to break this vicious cycle is to hide myself so deep in His plans, I'd be untraceable by the evil one. Susah signal bro bagai di tunnel kwwkwk.
All these facts strengthen my resolution. My Father has lavished me with so much love and understanding, more than I'd ever asked.
It's barely a month when I wrote how I was in the dark.
After so much revelations, assurance over assurance, I have decided that this time, there will be no turning back. I'm all in with God.
2019 would be a year with so much new things
Somewhere in 2019, I'm quitting my 7 year job. Might surrendering my PR. Taking bible school.
Like finally.
I've reached the point where the fear of holding everything back is greater than the fear of letting this all out. If today was my last day on earth, I wanna make sure everything is counted for eternity.
I have been redeemed for a purpose, so that others may receive the same hope of redemption.
That nothing is too impossible for God. That He is God of families. He is God of generations.
2019 is the year of radical obedience.
When we obey, we start a ripple effect in the heavenly realm, in the unseen.
We're making ways for God to do the impossibles in our loved ones' life.
When we obey, we're setting up an example for a legacy to follow.
When we obey, we take over God's territory where the evil one is rendered powerless.
And everything we do is out of a heart that is compelled by God's love.
We have been loved first. Therefore, we love.
Love manifests itself in obedience.
We're doing what is necessary, even taking a plunge to the unknown, because we know that God's love is always for us. And we simply want more. We want to love more. We want more of God.
So here's to 2019 where the Father is taking full reign over my life.
This my heart, Father. This is all I have. And this is the best I can give you.
Thank You for redeeming my heart.
Thank You for doing so much unnecessary stuff, given Your one and only Son, just to make sure I can come to You freely.
Thank You for letting me in Your grand plan of salvation.
Thank You for sharing Your heart for generation with me, this is so undeserving.
Thank You for taking care of everything, my Alpha and my Omega.
Thank You for never giving up on me, Father.
I love You. Forever.
XOXO
Grateful daughter.
Too much happenings and roller coaster ride with God.
Everyday, new things unfolded, discovered, unveiled before my eyes.
A few days ago, the day before Christmas, we (papa, mama, Febe, and I) went to Makassar, dad's hometown. TBH, I'd chose Jakarta home anytime for Christmas.
But well, what's important was family (papa senang), and as long as God's approved, then I'm good to go.
It was simply the best Christmas. The Prince of Peace Himself was with us.
I always know that my dad's side of family tree was sorta "colorful."
But not until God showed me, Himself, I finally understood a part of His grand plan to redeem me, and my extended family.
Here's a brief background about my dad's siblings of 5:
The first and fourth son have passed away. The first was due to sickness. The fourth was due to something shadier which I was uncleared of anyway. Both leaving some 'colorful' legacy as well.
The second son was my dad. You know our story. Or you can scroll to previous posts for more details hahaha.
The third, my aunt has 5 kids from 3 marriages. The first daughter (my cousin) was married for a year but apparently they are now separated.
God reminded me all these facts. And one thing cross my mind : generational curse.
It was so obvious (well, now haha) that there's something going on in my family that WAS NOT of God. I don't know which generation started all this, what had happened to create such loop hole where the evil one freely roam like a lion, creating division and destroying marriage in our family.
And this has reached my layer, seeing my cousin's short-lived marriage.
Not only flipping over this puzzle pieces, He also flipping over other pieces:
His plans for redemption.
When my mom met my dad, she had nothing in mind.
Little did she know that she'll be the agent of change in my dad's life.
She wasn't perfect. But she perseveres.
That perseverance created room for God to move in our family.
She has struggled a lot, which is YA OF COURSE LA STRUGGLE LA YA, loving and serving my dad who carried the baggage of his family tree. All the bitterness who has been passed away from generation to generation.
See, mom doesn't feel special, but I can see clearly how God brought my mom to my dad : an agent of change, an agent for family redemption.
She persevered. She learned to love like Jesus. She made it possible for God to come to our rescue.
I couldn't imagine if she decided to give up, to just leave, to call everything off.
I remember those times when the only thing that made her stick with my dad was my sister and I.
How faithful God is.. He moves heaven and earth to save us.
He moves heaven and earth to redeem us.
I can't even.............
God's perfect plan was BEYOND our best scenarios.
He reminded me that THIS is exactly why He set me and my sister apart for His Kingdom.
He reminded me that the only way to break this vicious cycle is to hide myself so deep in His plans, I'd be untraceable by the evil one. Susah signal bro bagai di tunnel kwwkwk.
All these facts strengthen my resolution. My Father has lavished me with so much love and understanding, more than I'd ever asked.
It's barely a month when I wrote how I was in the dark.
After so much revelations, assurance over assurance, I have decided that this time, there will be no turning back. I'm all in with God.
2019 would be a year with so much new things
Somewhere in 2019, I'm quitting my 7 year job. Might surrendering my PR. Taking bible school.
Like finally.
I've reached the point where the fear of holding everything back is greater than the fear of letting this all out. If today was my last day on earth, I wanna make sure everything is counted for eternity.
I have been redeemed for a purpose, so that others may receive the same hope of redemption.
That nothing is too impossible for God. That He is God of families. He is God of generations.
2019 is the year of radical obedience.
When we obey, we start a ripple effect in the heavenly realm, in the unseen.
We're making ways for God to do the impossibles in our loved ones' life.
When we obey, we're setting up an example for a legacy to follow.
When we obey, we take over God's territory where the evil one is rendered powerless.
And everything we do is out of a heart that is compelled by God's love.
We have been loved first. Therefore, we love.
Love manifests itself in obedience.
We're doing what is necessary, even taking a plunge to the unknown, because we know that God's love is always for us. And we simply want more. We want to love more. We want more of God.
So here's to 2019 where the Father is taking full reign over my life.
This my heart, Father. This is all I have. And this is the best I can give you.
Thank You for redeeming my heart.
Thank You for doing so much unnecessary stuff, given Your one and only Son, just to make sure I can come to You freely.
Thank You for letting me in Your grand plan of salvation.
Thank You for sharing Your heart for generation with me, this is so undeserving.
Thank You for taking care of everything, my Alpha and my Omega.
Thank You for never giving up on me, Father.
I love You. Forever.
XOXO
Grateful daughter.
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